Chapter 18 Good Manners In Business. Where Are They?

Greetings from rural Australia.

Good manners in business appears to be an oxymoron. Like business ethics.

The lack of manners in business is not only annoying to me, but to many others as well. The reason I was motivated to write this chapter is because readers of my blog asked me to.

What exactly is good manners in business?

Exactly the same as good manners at home. If you were taught manners at home, having good manners in business should be a natural follow on.

But is it?

Either the majority of business people were brought up in Mother Hubbard's cupboard; or if they weren’t, they obviously don’t think manners in business is important, because they often don’t bother to show any.

Good manners is about being gracious.

It’s about putting someone else before you. Your focus is on making things very easy and comfortable for the other person. It’s about making them feel good about doing business with you. It’s all about them. It’s never about you.

And good manners should be displayed just as much when someone is selling something to you as when you’re selling something to someone else. We all have something to sell every day of the week.

One of the biggest turn offs in business is the rude, abrupt, callous and often insensitive manner in which a business person says no. And it speaks volumes about their personal character and integrity.

Job applicants tell endless stories of sending in an application and never getting a response. Not even a thank you, but no thank you. How rude and insensitive this is. To not even take the time to acknowledge the effort a person makes to apply for a job is selfish in the extreme.

Major companies are renown for this. And many small businesses think this is an acceptable form of behaviour as well.

Advertisers constantly complain about clients sending in new material at the last minute. Squeaking in just before the deadline. Even though they know several weeks ahead what date the deadline is.

Perhaps the most common complaint about bad manners is when someone leaves a telephone message on voice mail and the phone call isn’t returned. It’s particularly annoying if it’s someone they’re doing business with. When the call isn’t returned, their bad manners are on show. And noticed.

This one is almost as bad. It’s the person who leaves a phone message but not their phone number.

Few of us are walking phone books. It takes just a few seconds to leave a number.

How long does it take for the recipient to scrounge around, looking for the number? More than a few seconds.

This is thoughtless, selfish and self centred.

The simple act of acknowledging a personal letter or an email that requires a reply is good manners.

To ignore the letter or email and not reply is not only bad manners, it’s extremely rude. Like not replying to an invitation to someone’s house for dinner.

To attend a company function and not send a thank you within a few days is crass. And the company who gave the function knows who you are. And remembers you.

Here’s a few examples to ponder over.

I recently watched the movie ‘Triumph’. It’s the story of Ron Clark, an American teacher who triumphed over adversity.

He took on a class of ratbags and drop outs in a poor neighbourhood and asked them to reach for the moon and landed them among the stars.

He motivated this class of no hopers to achieve spectacular and unheard of – for them - academic success within 12 months. And wrote himself into popular culture as a can do, miracle teacher.

He certainly motivated me.

I was so impressed with his story, the next day I went to his website, Ron Clark Academy, to see what it was all about.

Because his academy is free to selected disadvantaged children, he depends on donations.

There’s a section of his site that says his academy takes donations in kind.

As The Fitz Like A Glove™ Ironing Board Cover in on the boards of fashion designers, I offered his academy as many covers as they needed for their fashion design courses.

In my email I told him I’d just seen the movie ‘Triumph’, and was so motivated by the good experiences he was giving disadvantaged children, I wanted to help. And then thanked him for the opportunity to be able to give something back to his community.

That was over a month ago.

I’ve heard nothing.

Not even an auto responder to say thank you, we’ve received your email and will be in touch shortly.

Or an email from the Mail Administrator to say his email address was no longer active.

Do I feel the same as I did when I finished watching the movie?

Of course I don’t.

And if they replied now, they’d have to have a very good reason for taking so long.

Because I no longer feel the same intense, keen desire to help them that I did a month ago.

Another for instance.

After writing Chapter 17, What An Attitude!, I emailed the link to this chapter to Lyn Palmen of Women’s Network Australia.

On a Saturday afternoon.

I told her she so inspired me with her enthusiasm, I felt compelled to write about her.

She replied to that email that Saturday evening. Even though she’s travelling on business with her daughter Maddi in tow.

That’s pretty perfect.

Another for instance.

My bank is Westpac.

I had an idea to do a joint venture with Westpac using one of my products. I didn’t know where to start. But I thought starting at the top and working down was my best option because decisions are always made upstairs.

After looking at Westpac’s website, I decided that a letter to Ilana Atlas, Group Executive, People and Performance, was my best option.

Ilana not only answered my letter within a few days of receiving it, but was instrumental in getting me in front of the right people.

And yes, I did get my product into Westpac. But in a different way than I first envisioned.

Another score of pretty perfect. And I won’t hear a word said against Westpac.

Yet another for instance.

Jodi Picoult is a best selling author. Her 15 novels have sold 12 million copies around the world.

Change Of Heart, Nineteen Minutes, Handle With Care and My Sister’s Keeper are some of her titles.

12 million copies sold is 800,000 sales per book. She ranks up there with Dan Brown and James Patterson as the top 3 authors for worldwide sales.

She’s also a busy mum with 3 teenage children, yet manages to research and write one novel a year.

In a recent magazine interview for New Idea, Jodi says she gets 150 emails a day.

And takes the time to answer every one.

Why?

She says it’s common courtesy. There are all these books out there, and you picked mine, she reasons. I just want to thank you, she says earnestly.

That’s very perfect.

Unfortunately the likes of Ron Clark Academy outrank the Lyn Palmens, Ilana Atlas’ and Jodi Picoults of the business world.

Unwillingness to communicate effectively is endemic within organisations. Both large and small.

But it comes at a price.

If given a choice, people gravitate towards the company that pays attention to them.

Because nobody willingly wants to be ignored.

Do you?

And ignoring a customer, a supplier and a prospect is an appalling display of bad manners.

When a business shows bad manners, they’re telling you and me that we’re not as important to the business as they are to themselves.

Here’s some more examples of bad manners.

Look at websites.

A significant percentage have no real contact information.

Most have only email contact. Some might also have a telephone number. Very few have a personal name to put with the business. And an alarming number don’t have a physical address.

How do you complain? Everyone can ignore an email.

Or is this the reason information is so scant? They don’t want to know?

This goes beyond lack of communication. When I see this, I come to one conclusion. I don’t trust them.

What’s the first thing I think of when I see a website with scant information?

What are they afraid of?

Do they fear me calling them on the telephone and interfering with their day? Or complaining about a faulty product or bad service?

Might I send them something in the mail? What’s so bad about opening an envelope?

Aha! I’ve come to the conclusion they’re laying low because they’re chased by debt collectors.

What if I want to see what their premises look like? Or are they a scam site and there is no fixed address?

Perhaps you’re not aware this is what other people think.

You’re now on notice, because now you know.

I recently visited a marketing website because I was invited to drop in and have a cup of coffee. And I wanted to know where I was going.

I was going nowhere.

The only information on the site was their telephone number. No names of the owners, no physical address, and the only email contact was through a form on their site. Even worse, they didn’t have a listing in White Pages Online.

This is a marketing company spruiking how they keep you in touch with your target market.

They should be ashamed of themselves for being so focused on themselves.

On the same day, I searched on Google for another marketing organisation which invited me to attend a workshop.

I had exactly the same experience as the first one.

Only a telephone number.

How can I know if I want to attend a workshop if I don’t know where it is?

What do business owners think of when they design their Contact Us page?

Not you and me, that’s for sure.

What do I think of them?

Selfish, self centred, self focussed, perhaps ignorant, but most certainly displaying bad manners bordering on smugness and rudeness.

Strike two. One more and they’re out.

Another example of bad manners.

I recently read a response to Valerie Khoo’s Sydney Morning Herald Small Enterprise Blog on the subject of contact information.

A reader, who has just finished building a house, says he was constantly dismayed at the number of businesses who don’t have their street number prominently displayed.

And the trouble he had in finding their location so he could look at products.

Why expect a customer to drive around and around and around in traffic looking for a number that’s not there?

Why not make it easy for them to find you?

A simple fact. It’s dangerous for a driver to have to peer at buildings for a number while in traffic.

If nothing more, why not care about the driver’s safety and the safety of all the other people on the road dodging him while he’s careering around trying to find the right premises?

How many times have you received an invoice, wanted to query it and found there’s no telephone number? Or no address to send a payment to?

Quite simply. Why not care about other people?

That’s what bad manners is all about. Not caring about those around you.

For some of you reading this, you might think this is trivial compared to the other issues facing a business.

Such as the spreading doom and gloom about the lack of consumer and business confidence. The several rises in interest rates. The effect of the collapse of Opes Prime and the sub prime loans debacle.

Think again.

Bad manners in business might not be the topic of the month.

But believe me when I say it’s a topic that smoulders away.

To see what I mean, casually mention it as an aside to someone and then listen to them blast away on the subject for as long as you’ll give them.

One day you might lose a customer for no other reason than you ignored them once too often. Your behaviour fanned that smouldering ember into a flame of irritation so intense, the only way to put it out is to dump you.

You might be surprised to learn that almost everyone is business has dumped someone for this very reason.

Can you afford to lose any client or customer?

What’s the cost to you and how much harder is it to find new customers in an uncertain market?

How much easier is it to smooch your current customers into staying with you purely by paying attention to their needs by being gracious and displaying good manners?

The well respected Sydney Image Consultant, Chris Rewell, has devoted a page on her website to good manners and business etiquette.

She makes two thought provoking observations.

“Good manners open doors that a good education will not”.

“Good manners make the world go around with less confusion and fewer misunderstandings. Good manners reduce ignorance and awkwardness”.

Visit Chris Rewell's website at www.chrisrewell.com.au/busetiquette.html to read more of what she says about business etiquette.

I might be a Guerrilla From The Bush, but I know that please, thank you, how can I help you and returning phone calls all enhance my standing in the eyes of customers, suppliers, prospects, friends and family. I know that good manners is all about common courtesy, trust and endearing customer service.

What do you think?

I’d love you to post your comments and let’s see if we can help each other. Your expertise and wealth of experience is wasted if you don’t share it with others.


Take care,

CAROL

Carol Jones
Director
Interface Pty Ltd
Ilford NSW 2850 Australia
Designers of The Fitz Like A Glove™ Ironing Board Cover
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The Fitz Like A Glove™ Ironing Board Cover, Roadworks Apron, Log Lugger, Travel Bug Shoe Bag, Mr Chin’s Laundry Bag and Sweet Shoo are all simple solutions for difficult problems. And every one is a joy to use.

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A comment about LinkedIn. If you’re not a member of LinkedIn, when you click View Full Profile, you’ll be asked to join. It’s free and the option is yours. There are benefits to joining. Once you’re a member, you can key in the name of any person you do business with. If they’ve taken the trouble to complete a Profile, you’ll be able to assess their background, their capabilities and the calibre of person they are. You might be, as I am, often pleasantly surprised. So go have a look.